Can You Control Your Feelings?
This is one of the most damaging misunderstandings of our day. You don’t have to let your feelings dominate your life. You can manage your emotions. But the more you tell yourself that you can’t, the more likely you will give in and struggle with emotional dominance. And when a person is controlled by their feelings, the outcome is almost always detrimental to their lives, as well as the lives of those around them.A life dominated by feelings, rather than by wisdom, is at odds with a life that is guided by the Holy Spirit. Jeremiah 17:8 and Psalm 1:3 tell us to be like firmly planted trees. 1 Peter 5:8-9 teaches us to be well-balanced and temperate (self-controlled), in order to protect us from the evil one. Psalm 94:13 says that God teaches us discipline to remain calm in adversity. All of these Scriptures imply that we are to be ruled by wisdom and the Holy Spirit, and not by our flesh (Romans 8:6-8). Living by the flesh in Scripture is essentially doing what we feel like doing, instead of what God wants us to do.A person who is controlled by feelings is characterized by highs and lows, and often angry outbursts followed by a sullen aftermath. Allowing your emotions to control you, means acting out of fear rather than faith. It is dejected when disappointed, rather than trusting in God’s sovereignty. It is reacting to situations according to our feelings, instead of responding thoughtfully, according to wisdom, faith, and God’s prompting.You can do it. You can gain control over your feelings and manage your emotions, rather than be dragged around by them. Here are three questions to ask yourself when you sense you are emotionally overwhelmed.
- What is the real reason I am feeling this way?
- Is that really true? (What does God’s Word say?)
- Is this feeling helping me or hurting me?
- Will I pledge my trust in and commitment to God, no matter what?
Emotions are real, and they are given by God as gifts to bless us and others. But by allowing them to take over and control us, we turn his blessing into a curse. He has given you the strength to turn that back around and take charge of your feelings, by doing the right thing no matter how you feel, making your emotions your servant, rather than your master. You can do it, but you have to decide.“God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” – 1 Corinthians 10:13 NIV