Stop Whining
In Matthew 6:16-18, Jesus told his followers to fast differently than the way a lot of people of his day fasted. It seems a number of people enjoyed attention from others for their “sacrifice” of fasting. They made it obvious that they were sacrificing food, and they took on the appearance of being weak, disheveled and hungry. And of course, they let every one know what they were going through.
Jesus said, “Don’t do that.” You don’t need to let anyone know you are making a sacrifice. Clean yourself up, put a smile on your face, be pleasant and be a blessing to people. Let your sacrifice be between you and God.
When I read that passage this week, I immediately thought of a young Bible College student years ago who had taken his first “labor” job at a bicycle factory near our town. I know he had to work hard, but his demeanor was almost laughable. Every time I saw him he was slumped over and walking slow. When you asked him how he was doing, he would go on and on about how hard his job was and all the hours he was working. Midway through the summer, I sat down with him and said, “Mike (not his name), this is only a summer job. It’s not that bad. Some people spend their lives working these kinds of jobs. Be grateful for the work and stop drawing attention to how hard it is.”
I’m really glad that he took my advice. His attitude changed, and today, he’s working a much harder job in a dangerous part of the world as a ministry leader in a persecuted land.
There are some who seem to have a need to share their adversities with everyone. You almost hate to ask them how they are doing because when you do, they feel compelled to come up with multiple reasons you should feel sorry for them.
I have a hard time understanding that outlook. I was homeless at 17 and was living in a motel. I’ve lived in campgrounds and have had to sleep in my car more than once. But honestly, nobody knew it. I was a new Christian and was ecstatic about what God had done for me. I knew he had a plan in it all and that adversity was opportunity for me to learn to trust him and put him on display in my life. People who knew me then would tell you that I was happy. Sadly, I think I complain more today than I did when life was REALLY rough.
Then I think of my in-laws. Both live with daily pain. They have difficulty walking, getting in and out of the car, and even out of bed in the morning. Yet their joy in life is evident to everyone who know them. Ask them how they are doing and you will hear them express gratitude for God’s goodness.
I think the tendency to whine and complain is really a drive to get people interested in our lives. But it doesn’t work. People shun complainers. We are drawn to joyful people. We like hanging out with those who are interested in us, rather than those who work at trying to get us interested in them.
So turn it around. Go to God with your troubles...he does invite your prayers. But when it comes to other people, I’m not saying that you should pretend that everything is wonderful, just focus on being a blessing. And you’ll find that the smile you give to others will actually change the way you feel on the inside.